May you find strength and power
in places you never thought to look.
HELLO DEAR LOVE,
I got to the point in my career where I was having to share my story over and over with clients on a similar path. So I took a season to write out an extended version of my story that is both my personal health recovery story and a guidebook. I wrote this to be of support to people with difficult health challenges that I may never get the opportunity to meet. I hope this helps you in your process! Where ever you are in your health journey I am sending you patience and perseverance to get to the bottom of your case aka the root cause of your suffering.
I fell into health advocacy work out of a necessity to stay alive. I have an extremely environmentally fragile body. At one point, my organs and bodily systems were not able to run without guided help of machines and expensive supplements. This is the story of how I learned how to detox my body and mind and get my life back.
THYROID CHALLENGES AT EIGHT YEARS OLD
At 8 years old my doctor put me on thyroid medication (Synthroid, one of the most prescribed medicines in the world). This drug helped my brain and thyroid function, but not without nasty side effects. My Doctor had my mother convinced I had to be on it, but we found out years later that she could have simply taken gluten & sugar out of my diet and my thyroid would have corrected itself. Unfortunately, by the time a naturopath told me this, my body was already too dependent on Synthroid, and I wasn’t able to safely stop the medicine. My mother and I learned the hard way that putting a child on hormonal drugs at a young age causes many issues later on in life. Women are usually put on this medicine in their 30’s or older. The lesson here is to always see a naturopath for a second opinion, and figure out food allergens before committing to a medication.
Age 13 ::: Girl in the bubble at the hospital. Western doctors running tests on me to try to figure out why I was so sick.
Diagnosis: mystery illness
EARLY CHILDHOOD DEVELOPMENT
My childhood mornings were often filled with anxiety about having to get out of bed, because I was just too tired and confused. I never went to sleep peacefully at night, because there was always a lot of fighting. The words “never and always” are words that should be used carefully…unfortunately they are true in this case. Sadly, this is the case for many children in our world. I believe that I chose my parents and childhood with developmental trauma to learn certain things in this incarnation. Other than being brain/body fatigued most of the time, I had a fairly “normal” childhood, sprinkled with psychological-horror-film-emotional-abuse that distorted and gas-lit the reality around me. I would later find out that I had experienced, Family Scape Goat Abuse (FSA) . This less-than-bubble-gum-fun childhood later fostered in me the need to overcome limiting programs, survival adaptations and CPTSD. Note: I am aware that our parents are all doing the best they can do with the understandings that were passed down to them. The books that helped set me free later on in life were, Complex PTSD by Pete Walker, Healing Developmental Trauma by Laurence Heller, PhD and Aline Lapierre, PsyD and The Tao of Fully Feeling by Pete Walker
MEDICATING WITH HUMOR IN HIGH SCHOOL
One day, a little girl threatened to beat me up after school, and I had the idea of making her laugh. It worked, and that girl ended up adoring me, singing and dancing with me in the locker room that same day. I took this adaptation and ran with it. I began to use humor and artistic expression to ease the emotional pain inside me. I was voted funniest in high school, and thus the trend of medicating through oddity and laughter began. I think thorough investigation should be done in the homes of funny children… most of the comedians and funny friends I have all had varying degrees of abuse, neglect and violence in their childhood. It’s a great coping adaptation…better than drugs! I waited to try drugs out once I got to college.
SEVERE DEPRESSION IN COLLEGE
I applied to colleges in states with mountains because mountains always seemed to feel like the earth was holding me. I studied Photography, Music, and Graphic Design at Montana State in Bozeman. (very nice of my father to send me to this school) When I got there I realized how different I was…my developmental trauma became very obvious. People all had these amazing stories about how their families got along and how close they all were. I just had to be quiet and hope no one asked me about my family. Luckily, no one cared about me enough to ask. lol. My funny side somehow deflated during the college phase and would hide in my dorm room making art and listening to trip hop music most of the time. I loved doing photo shoots of women in nature and develping the film myself was such a natural high. I started to do a bit of performance art as a way to express the emotional pain inside me here and there. I tried acid once by myself and began cutting my arms with a knife. So I didn’t do that again. I tried mushrooms once and felt like God was talking to me and helping me see that it was all going to be okay. I tried cannabis once…and then again…and then daily for about 3 months. Mary J helped me focus and calmed me down. I loved skiing stoned! But then it began to make me paranoid so I had to slow down with it. For this reason, I never became a full fledged pot head…but I did have an occasional hit off someone else’s joint…. until my 30’s. In my 30’s I finally reached a place were being sober felt like higher vibes then being stoned. Thank goodness! That plant works wonders for many people, I realize….but for me it was a crutch and getting in the way of feeling my true feelings so I could learn how to grieve and work towards finding true peace and equanimity. After going to yoga school in my 30’s I soon realized …there is no greater high than leaning into the beauty of nature and taking deep breaths…or being of service to people in need.
MY TWENTIES ROCKED!
In my early twenties I moved from Dallas to Brooklyn to deepen my understanding of the expressions I felt trapped inside me. Still struggling with my energy levels, I discovered and became addicted to a Brazilian fruit called, Guarana and Yerba Mate Tea; they were my choice of stimulants to stay awake and be charismatic in the world. These two stimulants allowed me to spend my twenties (mainly in NYC) having a blast exploring my theatrical side and meeting inspiring people. That decade, I wore a lot of hats: Performance Artist, Yoga-Kung Fu-Butoh Teacher, Singer, Photographer, DJ, Comedy Improv Student, Raw Foods Chef, Event Curator, Yang Yoga enthusiast, Music Producer and dabbler in Vipassana Meditation Retreats.
My Thirties
But… as you may have guessed…this chapter was short-lived. At 27 I could no longer hide my health challenges. I was spending more and more time alone and in bed as my health declined. I could no longer turn to my Guarana /Yerba Mate method because my adrenals were shot and it gave me instant panic attacks. Not being able to take stimulants, I found myself waltzing through life with ”the lights on…but no one home.”
My time in New York came to a violent halt one sunny Brooklyn afternoon when I was riding my bike to a farmer’s market and got hit by an SUV. I remember hearing my body hit the vehicle and then flying through the air. Luckily I landed like a cat so there was no head damage. (Good thing too, as I wasn’t wearing a helmet.) But I did sustain severe damage done to my cervical spine due to whip lash. That was the final straw for me. I was barely able to move my body at this point.
One day my dear friend Nastassia visited me from Maui. Nas told me I should come to California to heal. I took her advice and set off on an epic nomadic healing journey that would cover the entire span of my thirties. I began to spend more and more time away from performing/art and began to dive into the world of organ detox. There was no shortage of awesome California hippies teaching me how to detox with herbs and foods.
At this point in my life, I wasn’t able to take on normal jobs where I had to make it to work at a particular time, simply because I couldn’t always get there. Along with being exhausted, I would lose the ability to think and speak when my health would do its “nose dive” dance. 9-5 jobs were simply out of the question.
So I developed adaptation mechanisms in myself to survive and adjust to this new lifestyle. I adapted by learning to see a need in people and then fill that need. I cleaned houses, landscaped, ran errands, gardened, was a nanny, organized houses, cooked, created lavish flower baths, reminded adults how to play and laugh, taught people how to make healthy food taste good, and cleaned cars—all to make ends meet and learn from people who inspired me, or who seemed to have a piece to my puzzle.
Ayurveda
One of my favorite barters of all time was with an Ayurvedic teacher named Mira Murphy (picture above) whom I met on couchsurfing.com We became dear friends. I helped Mira move and organize her new home while teaching her about Raw Detox/Culinary. Mira taught me about Ayurveda and Yin Yoga.
My time with an epic trail blazer
Turns out Mira’s mother was Rama Vernon, (Rama and Mira in picture above) from whom I would end up learning a ton. Rama Jyoti Vernon is a yoga teacher and peace activist. She was a co-founder of Yoga Journal, and of the California Yoga Teachers Association. She is considered one of America's yoga pioneers! One of the most incredible hearts this world has ever seen—a real trail blazer! After living with & spending time with Rama, I noticed myself beginning to believe that anything was possible and that I could do anything if I put my mind to it! (If it was my true Dharma, that is!)
Sharpening the Mind
Throughout my thirties I studied and apprenticed with different yoga schools, (Sedona Hot Yoga and Seven Centers) health-focused culinary schools, meditation retreat centers, organ detox centers, and detox health advocates as I was able to. Each place I studied understood that I was health challenged and allowed me the time and space to do as I needed.
Jennifer Richards
One of the yoga schools I studied at was Sedona Hot Yoga in Sedona, AZ, led/owned by Jennifer Richards. (picture above) Jennifer has this unique ability to see the light in most everyone put in her path. One day Jen said to me:
“I noticed that you shaved your hair completely off, can’t move or talk very well, and are sleeping in your car behind the yoga studio. Here are the keys to a house for you to heal in. You can come clean my floors once a day.”
I had surrendered to the death process at this point and was just waiting to die in the yoga school parking lot. But this generosity and kindness from a stranger sparked a great deal of hope in me. Jen became like a sister to me. She taught me so much about yoga, and life; she took me hiking, and introduced me to all of her detox expert friends. (7 years later Jen would end up inviting me to co-teach with her at her yoga school.)
Practice what ya preach
It took me all of my thirties to study and understand what was happening to my body, and what my body needed. My thirst for life and spiritual evolution was growing with each new-found friend/tribe. Sometimes I wanted to give up…but a ray of hope would always show up in the nick of time. The main problem was, I was only learning how to do the things I needed to do, but I couldn’t afford to actually apply them and take the time to heal my physical and emotional body.
Detox or Die
At around 38 years old, I had the option to sink or swim…. detox or die. I could barely stand up anymore and had to use a walker to move around the house. My friends often had to carry me around the house and feed me when I didn’t have the strength to hold a cup or bowl. I recently found a video of a woman with lyme that looks exactly like how I looked back then when I was bedridden… so you can get the full picture by watching this.
When I wasn’t seizuring I still looked “normal” and my blood was “normal,” so doctors and family members continued to ignore the issues at hand. This is, sadly, all too often a reality for many that suffer from “invisible illnesses.” One day I was talking to a friend of mine who had suffered the same way I was suffering. This friend told me if I did nothing I would end up in a wheelchair and eventually die of heart failure. (Well if that don’t light a fire under the ass!!!)
This didn’t sit well with me, and I finally decided I needed to move back to Dallas and live with my mother for a time so I could truly heal. (Which is exactly what every 38-year-old woman wants to do, haha.) My mother, Sunny, is the sweetest thing you will ever meet, but I was an apple that had fallen far from the tree. Going back to Texas ‘burbs where nightmare memories were made…after traveling the world, didn’t exactly light me up.
But it turns out it was exactly what I needed. On many levels. I realized that there is no greater love in the world than the love that a mother has for her daughter and vice-versa. If Spirit wants you to deepen a relationship, a mountain will be moved to do so. During that year of healing, I realized how blessed I felt to have come from such a sweet and funny woman. My mother is like a cross between Charlie Chaplin, Dolly Parton and Mother Teresa. I love her and love that I came from her.
I realized that I didn’t really know my mother until I came home to heal. My mother got to see for the first time what I was going through, and gave me everything she could so that I could finally detox my organs and lymphatic system properly.
My Dream Team Arrives
Once in Dallas, I found an incredibly intelligent Naturopathic Doctor (Dr. Sharon Krahn of the K6 Wellness team see above)) that was able to muscle test me along the way of my detox process. Dr. Krahn used Contact Regulation Thermometry (CRT) to have a deeper look into my body. CRT is a highly advanced technology that the K6 team uses to detect dysregulation in the autonomic nervous system, which precedes symptoms and disease. Based on over 40 years of research, CRT practitioners can accurately outline systems, organs, glands and tissues that are at risk or in the disease process. CRT is a true indicator of nervous system function as it evaluates nervous system fluidity. The goal at K6 is to guide people to learn how to live a life in balance. I am a huge K6 Advocate and I often say that they are the reason I’m still alive.
Looking for ice cream in the pantry
The label I was finally given by several Applied Kinetics doctors and CRT & EDS was found in the tissues and organs…..not the blood! Some of you already guessed it: Lyme. Lyme is a tricky slippery little devil. And actually the more Lyme bacteria you have in your body…. the less likely it will show up in your bloodwork! Looking for Lyme in bloodwork is like looking for ice cream in the pantry.
Save your money!
In the end, I wasted around $5,000 on blood work trying to figure out what my issue was…the answers never came though that antiquated method. Advanced CRT & EDS & NMT is the cutting edge technology needed to find the root source of health challenges. The Swiss are way ahead of Americans in this department. So my naturopath (Dr. Sharon Krahn) went to Europe to study the latest and greatest and then brought it back here to Dallas, TX. More about CRT & EDS here. More about NMT here.We would have also saved over $100,000 in the long drawn-out process of seeing tons of doctors with old short-sighted view points with “pills to fix it all.” P.s. Pill-popping will ruin your organs and gut bacteria!
The “business” of western medicine gets paid when you don’t get better. Some Western Doctors may have positive intentions, but due to having limited evidence or access to nutritionally based clinical trials they are not able to speak on behalf of nature and food as medicine. There is no funding for this kind of healing because it can’t be monetized. What is funded are all the pills we pop. Funded by the Pharmaceutical Industry. I have so much respect for the Medical Doctors that continue their education to become Naturopathic Doctors. In my experience they see the full picture. (this last paragraph was inspired by Aubrey Marcus’s podcast with Paul Saladino click here. )
Neuromodulation and the Subconscious Mind
“When we only address physical illnesses, we are only managing disease processes on a physical plane that 9 times out of 10 have their roots in the spiritual and psychological planes.”
-Dr. Josh Huse
Muscle testing and NMT became a huge game changer for me. My NMT doctor, Dr. Josh Huse was able to see exactly what the root source of my health challenges were! Dr. Huse suggested deepening my meditation practices and being more diligent with my physical detoxing (among many other suggestions and tips).
Dr. Josh Huse, Dr. Sharon Krahn, and Dr. Klinghardt all have many things in common. But there is one thing that sticks out to me the most. They believe that the healing process is just as much about the emotional and spiritual components as it is about the physical components.
Dr. Josh Huse (NMT = NeuroModulation Technique) explained to me that all of our emotions are driven by what we think, whether we are consciously aware of what we are thinking or unconsciously aware. He taught me that everyone’s actions and inactions are driven by the corresponding emotional tones that go along with each thought a person thinks.
He told me that our continual thought patterns (over time) become neurologically hard-wired into formed habit patterns. In yoga these patterns are known as Samskaras. Hard-wired thought pattern habits are hard to break. To move beyond these habits we need a solid meditation practice and we need to unpack each emotion that is associated with each habit. In one of Dr. Josh’s Huse’s podcasts he goes on to say:
“We all crave certain feelings that give our brain and body feedback. This feedback is our ‘brain reward cascade system’ that has been programmed to release dopamine to reorient that habit. When you get into the world of emotions you are never just talking about emotions; you're talking about your nervous system, your brain chemistry, your thoughts, and all of this extends beyond you and into your relationships and all the categories of your life.”
The NeuroModulation Technique was developed by Dr. Leslie Feinberg. NMT compares human beings to computers. Human beings are (obviously) more amazing than computers, but the same in the way that we have hardware and we have software. Bloodwork, X Rays, and Contact Regulation Thermometry are all largely an evaluation of your ‘hardware.’ NMT says that what distinguishes the living human being from the corpse is that the living human being has a “software/operating system” that the corpse doesn’t have anymore.
Health from the NMT perspective is the ability for the ‘software of the body’ to properly interpret its environment, whether it’s the outside environment or the internal environment. Thus, health is: choosing appropriate reactions based on our perception of reality. When our mind mis-perceives something to be terrible that isn’t actually terrible, it is an immune system overreaction to something that isn't actually harmful. It’s a software problem. This is why confused immune systems can destroy a body. NMT says most, if not all, suffering is simply a mis-perception of reality.
This complex behavior of mis-perceptions in the mind/body is a learned response. It is born from many things. The toxicity of the environment is one. Our environment continues to spring forth new toxins, bacteria, and viruses every year. Some of our ‘software glitches’ are genetically encoded.
Sometimes our immune system can be assaulted from shocks, traumas, and dramas. When there is non-stop high amplitude chaos happening around us all the time, we tune into that as a self-defense mechanism.
Human beings like to be hyper-vigilant and aware of what's going on. Thus, when a person leaves an unhealthy environment, the brain doesn’t always leave the templating that was created during that time of chaos. The brain will stay in an altered templating state to keep you alive, but now to that person a car door slamming is a gunshot going off.
Our brains have little micro-expressions of that going on all the time. The more chaotic things get, the more chaotic our reactions become. So you see with our health we have to address more than the physical component. Many now see the need to address the spiritual and psychological components as well. If you don’t you will only be managing disease processes on a physical plane that 9 times out of 10 have their roots in the spiritual and psychological planes.”
After I absorbed this information, I felt like I had just gotten out of some sort of epic yoga class. I felt immense compassion for humanity and saw how the wheel of suffering just gets passed down generation to generation until someone takes a stand and decides to trail blaze beyond old programs.
I realized that I had subconsciously wanted to die rather than work through the templates of my childhood. With this new awareness I began to communicate with the cells of my body and affirm that I was ready to do the work!
Biology-Food for thought
Here’s a mind-bending look at templating or programming from the biological point of view from Dr. Sharon Krahn. You were an egg in your mother’s ovary since she was a fetus in your grandmother’s womb. All the eggs your mother ever had, she had when she was in her mother’s womb. So think about all the shocks, traumas, and dramas your cells had been through before you were even born! Your cells have been through two and a half times of cellular memory! Chemically and emotionally, that's a lot! This is where miasms come into play. Miasms are cellular memories. Your cells remember assault and big experiences. Because of this, there are behaviors and propensities that we may be born with. Your mother’s cells are your cells.
Surrender to the process
Learning from my highly intelligent doctors, I realized I had a choice to be a victim of my heritage or begin to take the steps to liberate myself from my programs and conditioning. I knew this new healing path wasn’t a quick fix or a western-pill to dull sensations, but the outcome would mean living free and true to myself. So I decided it was worth the initial pain. I had to trust life… trust the mystery….and trust most importantly …trust The Divine Love that sees the bigger picture of it all.
Taking the Peanut Butter
off my antenna
I had given up meditating due to brain fog. One day I remembered what one of my yoga teachers from Sedona had said. Her teacher told the class if they needed extra help calming the mind before meditation, to try intense breath-work.
I had already deeply immersed myself in Shamanic breath-work culture and decided to link the two, and it worked! I discovered that if I practiced techniques like Shamanic breath-work or The Wim Hof Breath Method before I meditated, I was able to focus!
Being able to focus and relax into my practice left me with that familiar warm fuzzy feeling of being connected with Great Spirit. I often say, “The volume of good guidance gets turned up in my life when I get still long enough.”
Seizures & Flashbacks
On many days of my organ detox, I experienced very intense seizures and flashbacks of my childhood that were very difficult to integrate. Sometimes they would come on at the most inopportune times in public, which made me want to never leave the house. I knew I had more internal work to complete before going out in the world again. Along with my meditation and bed yoga, I started to use Yoga Nidra and the guidance from one of my favorite books for healing Trauma, The Presence Process by Michael Brown .
Yoga Nidra (similar to guided meditation) helped calm my nervous system, and The Presence Process helped me to begin to be able to observe my story from a non-reactive place. I began to learn how to feel my feelings unconditionally in order to integrate fully. I often had a hard time finding guided meditations and yoga nidra practices that fit my situation fully, so I decided to make my own personalized lullaby. I had produced music when I lived in Brooklyn in my twenties, so it was easy enough to make myself some delicious guided programs to de-condition my cells and subconscious mind. Doing this helped me begin to recognize antiquated thought patterns, and made it easier to feel them and then let them go. Now I help people “Design their Subconscious” with lullabies and guided practices.
“A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song.”
-Maya Angelou
Brave the Darkness
One thing I have looked into to uncover these emotional layers is doing a dark room therapy retreat. I’ve had friends do this in Thailand at Mantak Chia’s Tao Garden, and they all had deep transformative experiences. I look forward to giving this method a try! If you are currently bedridden you are probably no stranger to every day all day in a dark room.
(Often times people with chronic illness are also extrasensory and lights give instant headaches.)
The following is from the Amaya Inner Journey Centre: “Retreating into complete darkness for an extended period of time has a major effect on the brain. Shifts of consciousness can help us see that which is beyond illusion. If we take a look at the chemistry of the brain we can start to make sense of the biochemical process behind dark room techniques and their effects on the brain." It is a big dream of mine to one day “brave the darkness” in a dark room therapy retreat setting.
Mantak Chia (photo above) says…
"The effect of darkness is to shut down major cortical centers of the brain, depressing mental and cognitive functions in the higher brain centers. Emotional and feeling states are enhanced, especially the sense of smell and the finer senses of psychic perception. Dreams become more lucid, and the dream state manifests in our conscious awareness. Eventually, we awaken within ourselves the awareness of the source, the spirit, the soul."
“When one experiences complete darkness the area of the brain stimulated is a gland called the pineal gland. The pineal gland is the gland in the brain associated with our third eye. Spiritual leaders around the world view the "opening of the inner eye" as a time when we can clearly see shifts in our perspective, when we open up to our intuition and our own psychic abilities and when the outer world stays the same but our inner world changes. We know that the pineal gland needs darkness in order to produce and emit melatonin. What happens during extended periods in darkness can be described by participants as a waking consciousness.
Melatonin continues to build up in the brain as you stay in complete darkness. When the melatonin stores build up to about 15-20 mg the brain begins to realize it no longer needs melatonin and begins producing pinolene. Pinolene is said to be released by the pineal gland also and is responsible for what we call ‘the light show.’ In complete darkness you may be able to see light patterns forming. These visions are connected to the internal workings of the mind. At this stage there is a letting go of the ego as we lose perception of the physical world. This process often occurs within the first 3 days of darkness.
If we look deeper at the pineal gland and its response to the dark for more extended periods we are introduced to a substance called Dimethyltriptamine. This substance is naturally occurring within the brain, also produced by the pineal gland, and typically only released at birth and at death. It has been nicknamed ‘the spirit molecule’ because of the states of altered consciousness it provides and how it translates into feelings of universal compassion. This is a state where we can deeply work on healing ourselves from past traumas.”
Structural Therapy
My Neck! (shown above) Note there is no curve! Ouch! This is known as military neck. Something that is often seen in those that are bedridden for a long time. More heart openers and more sessions with Dr. Bynum has begun
to put the curve back! Dr. Bynum had worked with many Lyme patients and saw a trend in the bodies of those that have been in bed too long. It causes the lungs to collapse and makes breathing became extra difficult. Shallow breathing lends itself to a variety of health challenges. Dr. Bynum got my upper body to begin to open and I began to breathe better. It was quite a process.
Bed Yoga &
Heart Openers
I began to get adjustments to my spine from Dr. Bynum twice a week. At home I did a lot of heart openers (see in picture above) in bed to begin to wake up my spine and lungs. I called this “Bed Yoga”! I would set interval timers to go off every 3 minutes and place my body in a different yin yoga posture to allow gravity and my breath to begin to do the work for me.
Drop the Label
Dr. Sharon is a big believer in “dropping the label” of pathologies (illnesses). I found that wearing pathology labels (Lyme and Hashimoto’s Disease) only made my mind worry obsessively. So I heeded this advice and began to put my focus and energy on my passions and purpose rather than the labels of my health challenges. I do my best to not bring up Lyme unless I’m having a relapse and have to explain to people around me what is happening.
KEEP IT SIMPLE. DETOX AND NOURISH
Keep it Simple
Keep it simple!
Detox & Nourish.
Guess what all these labels have in common….Cancer, Graves Disease, Rheumatoid Arthritis, POTS, Hashimoto Disease, Parkinsons, Parasites, Fibromyalgia, Lupus, Lyme, Hepatitis, Raynauld's Syndrome, Diabetes, and Mold Illness…
.. they are all a reason to detox and nourish your system! In hindsight it was a giant waste of money looking for a label. If I could do it all over, every cent would have been spent on detox, quality-diverse organic foods. Easy peasy.
“Parasites are common in chronic illness”
~Dr. Klinghardt
This is Dr. Klinghardt…One of the most famous detox Doctors in America. He opened a detox school called: The Sophia Institute. I’ve taken several courses of his and lived with people that are clients of his that taught me many detox hacks.
Choose your
team wisely
After spending ungodly amounts of times in and out of doctors offices through out my life… I have gotten pretty picky in my laters years. When choosing a doctor I observe if they are kind. (obviously) I ask how they are staying on the cutting edge pulse of the latest innovations and studies. I observe if they are supplement pushers. Supplement pushing natural doctors are the worst….and very rich from getting you to buy supplements your body doesn’t need. Is their ego inflamed? Are they compassionate and in tune with their intuition? Do they practice what they preach? Does their staff love them? They truly care about your health and want you to get better? Do they continue to study and travel to the ends of the earth to stay on the leading edge of health and wellness?
There are healthcare practitioners that actually know what’s up and give a damn! Find a quality naturopath or functional medicine doctor in your area! The ones that have overcome a major health condition in their life are typically the best and care the most.
Luckily many doctors do tele-medicine these days!
We can be picky… and should be picky!
Move it or Loose it Sister!
Dr. Sharon saw that my lymphatic system (picture of the lymph system above) was severely blocked in her CRT session, so I had many Lymphatic Drainage Sessions at K6 to detox my Lymph with a machine called the Lymphstar Pro. (It’s like having 8 lymphatic massages at once.) This process began to give me energy! Your lymphatic system is like the trash can of your body. My body needs support in the lymph soo much that I bought a machine and became a Lymphatic Enhancement Practitioner! Learn more about lymphatic drainage here.
The only way you can remove the toxins from the lymph naturally is to move your body. If you can’t move, you begin to accumulate toxic backup. Especially if you have the MTHFR Gene Mutation (which I lovingly call the Muther-Fucker-Gene-Mutation)! This gene mutation makes it hard for your body to detox naturally like everyone else does.
Dr. Sharon recommended that I do some lymphatic work at home with a home Lymph Shaker Vibration Plate. At first I could only lay on it. Then I was able to sit. Then stand. One step at a time, sweethearts! I have many health challenged friends that have been or are bedridden. The ones who make effort to move every day, no matter how much pain is there, are the ones who pull through. Turn the part of the brain off that says you can’t do this, and do it!
Stay out of the Aisles
Most of what you need when you detox is not in the isles! After learning “label reading hacks” at Living Light International I went to the store to gross myself out in the isles of a grocery store. Discovering that the aisles were not my friend! ( HAPPY HACK: Dress up fancy when you feel like shit! )
Detox the Blood
I detoxed my blood by eating mainly vegetables and fruits. My diet was mainly a ton of dark leafy greens, chlorella, spirulina, chlorophyll, green juices, green smoothies, radishes, shiitake and portobello mushroom, kelp soups, seaweed, and tons of herbs.
Gut Health
Seal your gut so you can absorb your nutrients! Nourish your gut with the right diet. No sugar, no dairy, no gluten, no additives, nothing packaged, no ingredients that are not actual food. Seal your gut with the GAPS Diet, & Bone Broth! You won’t believe how much better you can think when you are able to absorb all the nutrients you are eating!
Read: The Gut and Psychology Syndrome by Dr. Natasha Campbell McBride MD
Best podcast I have found about Gut Health:
The Aubrey Marcus Podcast
AMP #116 - Dr. Amy Myers on Gut Health click here.
Dr. Amy Myers, gut health specialist and author of NY Times Best sellers The Auto-Immune Solution and The Thyroid Connection, sits down with Kyle Kingsbury and Aubrey Marcus to discuss the functional medicine approach to improve candida, SIBO and mold toxicity.
Detox the Organs
I worked for a private liver detox spot in Sedona, AZ (Grace Grove) for a time and learned many liver gallbladder colon detox hacks whilst there. I had also hired organ detox coaches online to help me learn the ropes throughout my thirties (Angela Stokes ), so this part was easy for me. After 10 years of detoxing my body I began to guide others in this vitally important process. You can check out the ways I support the detox process on my offerings page here.
Sweat
Our biggest organ is our skin! Dr. Sharon told me to start sweating once a day in a personal infrared sauna. Dr. Sharon’s assistant recommended that I castor pack my organs as I sweat which was very helpful. She told me to just lather castor oil all over my body and sit in the sauna (easier that way). Personal saunas look funny (like you are sitting in some sort of a futuristic milk carton) but they work and they are only $160.
Ozone Therapy
Cold Plunge
I don’t have a ton of fears… I’m a fairly courageous funky monkey..…but one of my biggest fears is the cold. One day I went down the Wim Hof rabbit-hole and got inspired! I heard his cold methods would help my joints… and that cold plunges have helped many people overcome Lyme. So I went to a Wim Hof Method Event (facilitated by Shereen Yusuff) in Dallas, TX. Overcoming my fear of cold opened doors for me in a very subtle way, not to mention it killed the inflammation in my body and made me feel like I had teenager joints. Try this tonight: Go to the store and grab 10 bags of ice and make an ice bath as cold as you can! Then sit in it (water up to your chin if ya can) for 2 minutes! Breathe slow! Get out and go do some QiGong in your backyard.
Be-friend your Colon
I had zero clue about healthy eating until I dated a dude that had a healthy diet at age 24.
But those first 24 years of my life I was completely ignorant to the effects that crappy food had on my body!
For example: When we eat junk food, processed food, greasy food, (anything that’s not a fruit or vegetable) these foods actually coat the inner walls of our colon like plaster on a wall. As time goes on and more and more of these layers get coated on our internal walls and becomes soo thick that there is only a small hole through the center of your evacuation tubes! Gross! And guess what this causes… faster aging in the brain and the body!
This is why health nuts always look way younger than fast food junkies.
{Important: If you are taking Anti-Parasite Herbs and sitting with Kambo during your detox, I highly recommend having your ass cleaned before the process. A few times if needed. But always leave space for 3 days to pass before you sit with Kambo after you cleanse your colon.}
“Few of us realize that failure to effectively eliminate waste products from the body causes so much fermentation and putrefication in the large intestine (aka the colon) that the neglected
accumulation of such waste can, and frequently does result in a lingering demise!”
-Norman Walker in his book, Colon Health
Ask your Naturopath if enemas and colonics are a good idea for your circumstance. Coffee enemas have saved lives! Read more about coffee enemas from the Gerson Institute here.
Detoxing parasites/bacteria with a backed-up colon is asking for trouble. You need to have open detox pathways to effectively detox your body so you don’t not punch a hole in the wall during the process. Ehem. Like I did. Emotions can run high during the detox. In my defense I was loosing my legs ….and scared ….and detoxing…. and so I took my grandma walker (that I had to use to get around the house because I couldn’t stand up) and slammed it into the wall breaking the wall. I have to say it felt amazing. And walls can be fixed. That moment felt like 40 years of repressed anger finally getting to express itself. I know I’m not alone in my desire to break fancy vases, walls, and plates.
Now if you want to feel high and joyful during a detox….and you have the funds…. and have a backed-up colon, go indulge in a colonic (best day ever)! So many pathologies are born from a backed-up colon. Free that shit!
As far as types of Colonics …. I am a fan of “closed-tank” colonic therapy. I found open tank colonic therapy to be painful. Plus, closed tank colonics allow you to see what comes out of you! This can be helpful and educational. Seeing undigested food come out of you will make you chew your food more diligently. Seeing parasites come out of you will make you be more careful when traveling through India and working at sushi bars. And seeing a fully intact bumble bee come out of your ass will baffle you for the rest of your life. How the fuck did that thing make it though my entire GI tract!?! This is not a joke ya’ll.
Hack: Remember to keep your colon moist and full of probiotics as you detox it by doing oil enemas and probiotic inserts! Learn more about that here. If this section grosses you out…you aren’t alone. I felt the same way at the beginning. I had to examine that program and learn to be alright with being human and having a butt that farts and poops! The “women don’t fart and poop” program runs deep in the South. Befriend your colon! Being human is cool!
If you ignore your colon when you detox your organs…you will be full of shit!
And if your colon is backed up your face will soon be full of zits! Jess learned that the hard way too.
#acnescarring
Beyond Belief
A few months into this intense detox something “clicked” for me. I was on my laptop watching Dr. Joe Dispenza speak on a “Food Matters” special called “Transcendence” (Episode: Beyond Belief). Dr. Sharon and her staff were all buzzing about this episode, so I had to see what all the hype was about.
I felt a deep resonance with the ideas Joe brought to the table about the power of believing. I realized that I was half-assing in the belief department and still not taking my meditation to the next level.
I decided to hold a little private ceremony in my backyard. Laying on the earth I went deep into the center of my brain and told myself that I would be one of the people that makes it to the other side of this. I played it all out in great detail in my mind’s eye, and saw it all come to pass. When I was done…I knew it would be so.
The Chrysalis Phase
Think of the room you are healing in like your Chrysalis Cocoon! You are simply in a phase of your metamorphosis my love!
Dr. Sharon Krahn told me to be very selective with what and whom I allowed into my healing process. I was beyond sensitive at this point and decided to heed this advice. I even deleted my Instagram, and deactivated my Facebook to temporarily lead a monastic lifestyle in pursuit of ”less background static.”
Basically bedridden, I stared at the same four walls for a year, and wanted to stay inspired. I printed photos of all of the teachers, heroes, and friends that I had met on my healing journey, and put them all over the wall to remind me to not give up. I felt called to turn my room into a healing cocoon with only love around me. I lovingly “muted” friendships with people that were not understanding, loving, caring, and empowering in my situation. And when I came out on the other side of the “thick”, those old friendships either healed or faded away and new next level friendships replaced the old.
Podcasts are your friends
If you are stuck in bed most of the day due to health challenges; best stay inspired and not let your brain wander too far into your current condition! These podcasts really opened my mind:
The Duncan Trussell Family Hour, The Aubrey Marcus Podcast , Tim Ferris, The Doctor’s Farmacy.
I interviewed people along the way of my journeys and have a podcast coming out in January 2021.
Stay tuned!
"When we change the way
we look at things…
the things we look at change.”
- Wayne Dyer
Kambo Peptide
Infusions
After I deepened my meditation & spiritual practices, things started to fall into place even faster. My Naturopath introduced me to a man named Jason Fellows, a Kambo practitioner. Jason had huge success with treating people who were suffering like I was with Kambo Frog Peptides. Do what!?!?! Yep. There is a particular frog ( the kambo frog) from the Amazon that has been helping humanity with strength building peptides! Don’t google it! It’s sadly one of the most interpreted subject matters on the internet.
Kambo gave me the strength I needed to get out of bed more often and boosted my immune function. This made me “less environmentally vulnerable” to the outside world. I was beyond excited to be able to start practicing standing yoga asana again! Talk about reverence!!!
Here are 3 of the most fascinating things I learned at Kambo School:
ONE
Since 1966, many peptides in Kambo secretions have been isolated, characterized and synthesized. As a testimony to its medicinal properties there are more than 70 Kambo peptide patents registered in the pharmaceutical world. However, pharmaceutical companies have made efforts to synthesize kambo peptides, but have largely struggled to develop medications due to the fact the Kambo frog does not secrete the same serum when taken out of its natural habitat.
TWO
John Daly’s team at the National Institute of Health in the United States discovered the bio active peptide called Adenoregulin in the 1990’s. This kambo peptide works on the human body though the sleep receptors. These receptors may offer a target for the treatment of depression, stroke and cognitive loss diseases, such as Alzheimer’s disease and Parkinson’s.
THREE
Several years of research has been carried out at the University of Paris. The team in Paris has shown that the Kambo peptides “Dermaseptin B2 and B3” are effective in killing certain types of cancer cells. Research at Queen's University in Belfast recently won a prestigious award for their groundbreaking work with cancer and Kambo. The action mechanism of Dermaseptin Peptides is produced by inhibiting the angiogenesis of tumor cells, with selective cytotoxicity for these cells. And actually many of the Kambo peptides have immune modulating qualities which can be highly beneficial for most pathologies, including lyme and cancer to name a few.
I am forever grateful to my Warrior Kambo Practitioner friends, Jason Fellows
and Angela Marie. Because Kambo was one of the biggest game changers for me, I decided to go to school to become a Certified Kambo Practitioner. Kambo Practitioners are a huge blessing for people who are hanging on for dear life! I wanted to be one of those people, like Jason and Angela, who are there for others who need it most.
Angela Marie ::: Kambo Practitioner in Dallas, Tx
I know Kung Fu
After Kambo, I was even able to practice my Kung Fu Kata again! Only this time I made the moves a little more Tai Chi / Qi Gong style than Kung Fu Style. Over the span of 8 months I went from a Golden Girl back to a Wonder Woman. When you are at the beginning…any movement will do! I really enjoyed using the moves of the ancient Jow Ga Kung Fu Kata I learned from my Sifu in Brooklyn, Duke Amayo. Whatever movement you choose you have to give it your all. Remember, your mind will tell you to give up a lot at the beginning. Move beyond the “give up thoughts” and rock it out. Some of my sessions felt like this in the beginning. Train hard. Listen to your body. Move every day.
We are never going
to survive unless
we get a little crazy!
After 2 months of Kambo, I was even able to dance again! I went to Ecstatic Dance Dallas and began to express all the things ( that words never could ) through the movement of my body.
Dance is particularly helpful for people needing to integrate their childhood. People are even overcoming Parkinsons through dance! When difficult things happen to us before we are able to articulate and fully express ourselves, it can stunt one’s emotional growth. Ahem.
If the above statement speaks to you, I highly recommend getting the audible book, ”Body Keeps the Score” by Bessel Van Der Kolk MD.
Dr. Kolk noticed that no amount of “talk therapy” was helping some of his patients that had early onset PTSD.
He discovered that dance and somatic therapy were much more effective methods of supporting his patients on their journey to becoming fully healed adults. I am someone who found “talk therapy” to be a complete waste of time. It kept me stuck in the story of my wounds rather than resolving them fully. To each one’s own.
Floating
As soon as I was able to drive again, I began to take trips to Austin, TX, to go see like-minded friends and float at the Zero Gravity Float Institute. The most profound meditations of my life have been in the tanks at Zero Gravity. You are floating by yourself in 1200 pounds of Epsom salt in a small room with plenty of space. It’s amazing what happens to the body/mind when you take away all stimulus! I have floated exactly 50 times so far, and I’ve found that the proverbial rabbit hole just keeps getting more interesting. So much magnesium and transformation! It’s no wonder aquatic life evolves way faster than land creatures.
#dolphins #whales #cuttlefish
“My philosophy: Don't get caught
with a fixed philosophy,
a set of safe beliefs,
a particular way of life.”
-John C. Lily
Random Side Note: The Pioneer of Float Tanks himself…. John Cunningham Lilly . John was an American physician, neuroscientist, psychoanalyst, psychonaut, philosopher, writer and inventor. He was a member of a generation of counterculture scientists and thinkers that included Ram Dass, Werner Erhard and Timothy Leary, all frequent visitors to the Lilly home.
Sleeping at last
After a decade of tackling my physical and emotional wellness, I began to be able to sleep all night without waking up! The nightmares stopped, and the fears were dissolving. I attribute this to everything mentioned above. I never realized how important sleep was until regular sleep became my regular. After being able to sleep I thought more clearly, and was able to communicate more effectively.
Thank you Juiceland
At the point in which I was super sick and running out of money, I had to swallow my pride and ask for help from friends. I used to work at Juiceland and I gave them a holla to see if she could have a drink-loan so I could keep detoxing while I was unable to work. Matt Shook, the owner, said yes! This brought me to my knees with gratitude! That was a huge game changer for me in my journey!
“Love you Matt and your juicy crew!
Thank you for making the drinks that heal!
My Bounce Back was special
It took me 2 years of deep diligent detoxing mentally, emotionally, and physically before I was able to teach and fully be out in the world again. When I felt solid enough, I decided to celebrate my bounce back in a special way…
I created a Butoh Dance performance called Euphoric Autonomy with my dear friend, Adhithee Ananda. The “prayformance” was one of the pieces in The Hotel Tesseract showcase directed by Selvin DeLeon at the Ervay Theatre for the Cedars Open Studio Tour.
…And Shortly after that I went on a tour teaching
Kung Fu and Deejaying Ecstatic Dance Events.
I booked myself in Dallas, Sante Fe, Taos, Durango, Sedona and San Fransisco and set off on my
journey at the beginning of 2020. It was incredible! I remember feeling like I had just gotten out of some sort of bizarre quarantine dream...every moment of the tour felt like the biggest blessing! The tour ended in Sedona where I co-taught a yoga teacher training with Jennifer Richards.
The Gifts of
the Pandemic
Adhithee and I were gearing up in Sedona to go on our spring tour together when the Coronavirus hit America. All of the studios we taught at were closed and we both had to take a moment to figure out how we wanted to move forward. My path for the next two years included, Kambo School, Colon Hydrotherapy School, Lymphatic Drainage certification program with Lymphstar, Trauma informed therapy, more meditation classes, aguahara and opening my very first Health Spa, Sacred Heart. I hope you will have a look around this website and find the modalities that work for your healing journey!
I love rockin alien hair!
Aguahara
Water
Therapy
My Aguahara Story
Like many others, I used the pandemic time to deepen my understanding of my psyche and the cosmos. As I took more meditation classes and made my morning practice the most important thing in my life…old childhood wounds and memories began to surface in order to heal. I had often heard people say, “Life won’t give you more than you can handle.” So I had finally reached a place that my psyche was ready to see the harder moments of my developmental ages. One day a friend of mine told me an Aguahara practitioner named, Aric Gutnick was coming to Dallas to give sessions in her pool. My session with Aric was hands down the most amazing moment of my life. It was the first time in my life that I remember feeling safe and free. And after this session I was able to get still and go within and process a very scary moment from my childhood….which led to even more inner freedom.
Trigger Warning
Around 9 years old I was swimming with my sister and a new babysitter. The baby sitter was a beautiful blonde cheerleader. She was my best friend’s brother’s girlfriend / crush. She seemed nice enough. This was the only time she would ever came to baby sit us. My sister decided to stop swimming and go inside for lunch. I was going to go inside and join her but I decided to do one more dive from the deep end to the shallow end of the pool. The baby sitter was waiting for me in the shallow end of the pool. I swam all the way to her using all of my breath. Then I saw her hands reach underwater and towards my shoulders. For whatever freaky reason she held on to my shoulders and wouldn’t let me come up above the water to breathe. I remember flailing my arms around trying to get away from her. I got away for a quick moment and she shoved my head back under with all her strength and held me down there longer. She finally let me come up. I was gasping for breath and soo confused why she did that. I looked over at her and she was just standing there smiling. I’ve only seen that kind of smile a few times in my life. It’s the smile on people’s faces that have zero care or compassion for human life. Very scary smile. Then she turned around and left the pool and went inside. I never told anyone about that moment as it had not been okay to express myself in my family and I had not experienced my family to be safe.
Follow the Fear
The late Godfather of Comedy Improv, Del Close always said, Follow the Fear. He was the teacher of many of great comedians, Mike Myers, Chris Farley, John Belushi. He noticed that the best improv scenes usually involved the characters wandering into territory that made them nervous or fearful. He also noticed that most of the rules for good improv were also rules for a good life. When I studied at improv schools in NYC this really stuck with me…and continues to stick with me. When something gives me that “good-nervousness” I like to get curious about it and see what is wanting to be seen or processed. Going to that session of Aguahara that day made me nervous. So I knew I had to go. But once I was experiencing it…. I felt it defrosting my heart…filling me with hope and courage…..I even accessed my deepest desires and dreams and saw them come to pass. When it was over I felt soo much peace in my body. I felt one with nature and my true nature…I felt goofy and happy and childlike. When I went home and got still the memory of that moment in the pool when my caretaker tried to drown me floated through my mind and I was able to witness it with out reaction. I saw it from so many viewpoints, life times, angles and then let it go. I realized how much of an effect that had on my life and began to do more research into developmental trauma and get support from trauma informed therapists.
Psychology &
Family Systems
I am someone that believes we choose our parents to learn certain things in each incarnation. Parents shape the psychological development of the human beings that they raise. If you were subjected to abuse or neglect, this is something you must overcome as an adult. As soon as you can, you can study psychology and get support from therapists and counselors to see what kind of healing and actions will need to take place and why.
For me, later in life I finally got help and learned how to overcome the developmental trauma that occurs due to being raised in “the narcissistic family system”. The narcissist of the family assigns roles to the children and the other parent plays the role of the enabler. There is a “golden child” and “the scapegoat”. I was chosen to be “the scapegoat” in both of my family systems. Scapegoats bear the burden of recovering from a childhood full of bullying, put-downs, unequal treatment, and abuse generally. They were deprived of the experience of growing up in a safe, stable home where they had the unconditional love of their parents or caregivers. If this is you, you can study more about Family Scapegoat Abuse or FSA.
Harry Potter’s adopted family is a perfect example of how the narcissist family system plays out. Harry is the scapegoat, the child whom the narcissist (Vernon Dursley) used as a punching bag. The Scapegoat is constantly manipulated and emotionally and/or physically abused. Vernon Dursley, the father is the role of the narcissist (whom is typically psychologically stunted) projects his own inadequacies and insecurities onto the child that has a magic that the narcissist will never have. The scapegoat is typically the strongest one in the family. The truth teller that stands up against injustice. The one with unending joy and creativity. The narcissist can’t stand this, and does everything they can to squash the hopes and dreams of the scapegoat.
Petunia Dursley the mother plays the role of the enabler that allows the abuse to take place. The enabler is typically unconscious to what is taking place. They are simply trying to be loved and fit in and will do anything to make that happen. The brother, Dudley Dursley plays the role of the “golden child”. The golden children are triangulated and taught to hate and make fun of the scapegoat child.
If the scapegoat “figures it out” and fully heals...they typically become a champion for the oppressed …. an advocate…have tremendous empathy …. do not enable the dangerous behaviors of anyone…..they are bully slayers …. and they become the best red flag detector for narcissism and enablers in the room.
When dangerous and/or narcissistic people raise children they are setting them up for a life of repetition compulsion. Which means…(if they don’t wake up to the truth) they will continue to attract the same abuse that they were raised with. They choose partners that use their insecurities as a weapon and know how to manipulate them until they become a shell of a human.
If you are a scapegoated child and you wake up from the patterns that were given to you and you step away from this template of suffering your family may continue to try and get under your skin. Therapists will tell you that scapegoats who leave narcissistic family systems often experience ongoing harassment through direct confrontation, or abuse behind the scenes, such as malicious lies and gossip. This insidious form of systemic psycho-emotional abuse is enough to make someone want to give up on life because the negative self talk is soo loud in their mind. But I did not give up. If this reminds you of your family try this on...The degree in which a person “people-pleases” is the degree in which their parents were dangerous.
Generally the Narcissist, Enabler, and Golden Child lack insight, and do not see themselves as liable for their own behavior. If this is sounding like your family dynamic role, I pray that you don’t give up either! You have a gift to give this world! Your family may never wake up and gain the insight needed to see what they did to you, but this is not your problem. You deserve happiness and peace, and if that means stepping away from your abusive family system...so be it. You can send them love and compassion from a far and find new tribe.
In my case I had to move far from my family and do my best to discover my true nature. It can be so hard to find a good trauma informed therapist, and for a long time I couldn’t afford the ones that I wanted to work with. So I continued to use nature, meditation, yoga, journaling, butoh, qi gong, CPTSD study and comedy improv to work with the healing my emotional body.
Trauma is
The Root
One of my lymphatic clients was fortunate enough to go spend 50k at a Lyme Detox Center in NYC that worked with trauma as they detox your body. She told me that they can only detox the physical body as fast as the emotional body will allow. They were taking her back and forth between detox machines and emotional work to get her to the place where her body could release all the toxins, and her mind was calm enough to observe the trauma that arose as the toxins left her system. Fascinating! This is more proof that the physical and emotional bodies are one. It is also interesting to me that every single client of mine with debilitating illnesses had severe childhood trauma. This is why so many people cry or have deep emotional responses during colonics, enemas, and lymphatic drainage.
After 20 years of diving down this rabbit hole of the healing journey, I can say whole heartedly that trauma is typically the root of the deeper physical suffering. You get to the emotional root….and observe it from a place of peace…you will begin to turn your life around. For some of us this could be a life long process if the trauma was intense enough.
Finding
Peace
So how can you find peace with the process of healing childhood trauma or trauma in general? “The price of freedom is eternal mindfulness”. Here’s a start of a list of actions you can take to begin the healing process. I learned many of these actions from these two incredible books called, Complex PTSD From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker….and Healing Developmental Trauma by Laurence Heller PhD & Aline Lapierre PsyD.
Learn how to detox and nourish the emotional and physical body a little everyday.
Learn how to identify of your defense mechanisms and armoring against intimacy. Go buy a coloring book and listen to Chapters 6 & 7 of the Book Complex PTSD by Pete Walker on audible as you color. Learn the positive side of the 4F type Trauma Responses you do most: Fight = Power Rangers & Flight = Road Runner & Freeze = Avatar & Fawn = Grover. After you listen…. take a walk to the park and have a snacky snack and then come back and journal. Write a letter to yourself from yourself. In this letter acknowledge and state what you are doing to armor yourself with these types of responses and why. These are your defense mechanisms! Learning this will help you learn more about your nervous system and what is required for you to grow and feel safe.
Share your story with proven friends and professionals that know how to validate & empathize & witness you as you share your childhood experience.
Learn how your unprocessed trauma responds to triggers and what your triggers are.
Learn how other people’s unprocessed trauma responses affect your nervous system, and how to regulate your own nervous system.
Learn how to protect yourself from people that use charming manipulation (especially if you are a sensitive empath).
Learn how to empower yourself if you have been used as the scapegoat. Examples: Kung Fu, Qi Gong, Meditation, Breathwork, Role Playing healthy anger with proven friends and professionals.
Move slowly in relationships so they have time to prove their love, character, integrity, morals.
Discover your true nature by expression. Example: Travel, Pottery, Poetry, Singing, Dancing, Butoh, Drawing, Painting.
Learn how to lean into healthy intimate relating with yourself and others.
Learn how to reparent yourself with books and inner child exercises. I can help you with this part.
Create a special safe place at your home. When you are triggered come home to this safe place and practice your triggering exercise therapies. I can help you with this as well.
Make a centering calendar. Everyday write what you did that day to center yourself. Examples: Journal, Yoga, Aiketo, Tai Chi, Stretching, Breathwork, Meditation. Each time you do one of these add a sticker to your Centering Calendar. See if you can make it to 30 days in a row!
Start a Positivity Journal and write in it a little everyday.
Shrink the inner critic by making the brain more user friendly. It’s called Thought Stopping! The same way you tell a dog to drop the ball. You drop the thought. Then you go to your positivity journal and write the opposite of that critical thought. This will be a great journal to read aloud to yourself on the harder days.
What are all of your best qualities, successes, resources, assets. Create a pintrist board or poster board of these things!
What is your Kryptonite? We must avoid the things that bring us down or hurt us. Make a list of places, people, and activities that brought you suffering or hurt your feelings. This will help you choose differently and avoid these things next time something comes up like this. Just like Superman avoids Kryptonite….Shack and Derek Geter don’t do drugs…..we must avoid things that hurt us so we can make space for the things we love to find us!
Day Dream a Beautiful Future! Make a list of wonderful possible futures. Make them super safe, kind & friendly, prosperous, joyful, fun, expanding, service oriented. Site examples of comparable success stories. (The Book: “The Obstacle is the way” can be of help)
Journal Entry: What qualifies your friends to be friends? How do they earn your respect and time? What are your non-negotiables?
Do an inner child grieving session with me
Dissolve your pain with boundaries roleplay with me. As an adult you are allowed to speak your mind. Talking releases pain and fear and restores coping skills. We are going to practice setting boundaries kindly. AND setting boundaries with intensity (when needed.) And we will learn when it is necessary to simply walk away. There is a right need for boundaries…...to say NO, to protest unfairness, to seek the protection of responsible adults. We will be role play scenarios so you can practice drawing and stating boundaries in these different situations.
The Current Mission
I pray that many more safe places to detox emotionally and physically arise in our world, as trauma is on the rise. I also pray that I can one day make this process affordable for all in my non-profit arm of my spa. Please contact me if you would like to support me in this process. Let’s make a difference in people’s lives that need it the most! My biggest dream is to help those with ALS, Parkinsons, Lyme, MS, and Cancer get the care and support and detox they need.